“i want to put a ding in the universe.” – steve jobs.

This week has, indeed, forced me to reflect upon a number of things. I sat in the car with my mom Tuesday afternoon, having left work early and joined her at Starbucks, and tears streaked my face.

I don’t know what to do with my life. I really really don’t. There were times, growing up, when I wanted to be this or that. A librarian, a professional tennis player, an artist or an author, a family court judge! But as time passed I never really found my heart leading me in these directions. I was always lost, in some ways. I’ve always been so unsure of myself that I let the voices of English professors, my mother, and my boss pave the way instead of listening to my best friend and my closest confidant at work.

They believe in me, but how far will that get me?

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking, and don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.” – Steve Jobs

I want to open a store, but you need money to do that. I’d love to have my own column, but my body of work is lacking. I want to be an interior designer, but do I really want to go back to school? I’d love to have a home and a family, but I’m alone.

Where do I go from here?

Steve Jobs’ passing yesterday evening has caused me to reflect on a lot of things. The man was insightful. From his meager beginnings to his humbleness throughout his life, I feel like everyone could learn from him. And the most important thing to learn is life can be short. Grab on to the ones you love and don’t let them go. Never have regrets. Be a rebel, make a difference. Fight the fight. Find the ability to believe in yourself and to be “insanely great!” It may take time (it certainly is for me) but I truly do believe it can happen. I have faith.

Life is brief and then you die, you know? – Steve Jobs

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2 thoughts on ““i want to put a ding in the universe.” – steve jobs.

  1. I always feel weird commenting on blogs of people I don’t know. It’s like, “who is this schmuck just responding like they know me or something?!”
    I follow you on twitter, though, so that makes it easier. For me, at least. If you’d like a little help in the connection department I would be the one that tweeted that you and travis are as entertaining as the Rancics (Rancic’s? confusion).

    I’m only 23 so that sort of leaves me lacking in the expertise department as well.
    Here I sit, about to throw my 2 cents in, anyway.

    just a few things:
    -you should check out the book Quitter by Jon Acuff. It’s a quick read and it’s funny and it addresses the same feelings you’re mentioning right here. So if nothing else, you won’t waste much time and you’ll laugh. You might even find some of it helpful.
    -the big problem about Quitter for me was that it sometimes assumes you know exactly what dream you’re trying to go after, and I still haven’t figured out what my big dream is, I’ve just figured out a few little ones….how do I know which one to go for? Donald Miller addressed that very question at the Storyline conference in Portland this summer by saying that if you want to find your destiny, find your dream. and if you want to find your dream, find some folks who are following their dream and be around them a whole lot, even if it has nothing to do with the tiny dreams you have for yourself. He said that finding and pursuing our dreams is contagious, you just need to find a few people who are already sick.
    -In the same Stanford speech you quoted above, Jobalicious talks a little earlier about connecting the dots. You’ll only connect them afterwards. He mentions dropping out of college but sticking around and taking a calligraphy class to pass the time, but it turned out to teach him the basics of the fonts he was able to use and implement on the first Mac, which was then copied by the PC market…so what he did while he was just sort of stuck in the cracks of life while everyone else seemed to be flying along nicely ended up literally changing the computer world as we know it today, and therefore changing the way we live our lives….and all he was doing was taking a stupid class that he didn’t care about because he didn’t know what else to do.
    -last one I promise-
    Faith is a big part of my life, but I swear I roll my eyes when people that know me say things like “Just don’t worry, God has it in control” it’s so cliche and feels so….just….AHHH YEA I KNOW
    So I would imagine if somebody I didn’t know said that to me that I’d roll my eyes twice as much, or twice as fast, or…something
    But seriously, the freedom that can be found in not just saying, but owning the idea that you don’t have to have it all figured out because God does….I mean, it’s pretty great.
    God knows you don’t know what to do right now. God knows your desires and strengths. He knows your flaws and failures. He knows them because He designed you that way. He did it intentionally because He has a purpose for you right now, 5 hours from now, 5 years from now. He never tells us that we always need to know what’s going on, that’s a belief we picked up probably around the same point that someone said windbreakers were snazzy looking (that’s just my guess, though) He wouldn’t call you to do something and then not give you what you needed to do it. He wouldn’t ask you to go someplace and not give you a map. He’s done this before. He’s got this. He’s got you. You’re right where He wants you, if you weren’t, you’d know it.

    Sorry I wrote a novel. Sort of.
    I hope you find some encouragement in at least 1 or 2 of those words.
    Have a great Friday!

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